Letters to My Love… (2)

You are the smile on my face, inspiration for my foot steps, and motivation behind my breath. No less, and a lot more! How many times do I want to tell you that I love you, but there are not enough words. And, the words commonly used are not dignified enough! O Love! O Love! O Love! You teach me how to live. You are an example of life itself. Actually, you are ‘the’ Life. Your eyes are full of dreams, even at dusk! Who knows it is a new beginning! Your lips have freshness of rose petals, and, your smile is like that of an infant!

You made my life what it should have been ideally.what it was, when you first met me, but a replica of hell.my eyes were as dark as starless nights, my lips were dry leaves, and smile that of a dying person. You made me live, you made me love, you made me the Love!

Letters to my Love… (1)

It is a midget like expression in comparison to what I feel for you, and, what you feel for me! Mere ‘I love you’ is not enough. I wish language had such a thing as expression in it, then I would have told you what you mean to me…

You are not a flower, whose life is a day or two; nor are you a moth, who dies for the love of light! You are light itself- one who can consume a million moths and still dazzle the Sam- patiently and peacefully.

You are not the universe, for universe is too tiny, you are not anything, nothing in particular but everything that one can be, and that which one cannot be. You are not ordinary, nor is my love for you. My love is not a mere spark, or a bonfire lit in controlled circumstances; my love is a fire that can consume forests , villages and cities alike, and still be unsatisfied. You are that first drop of rain which lands on this rage, and instantaneously calms it down.

For how many times do I want to tell you ‘I love you’; but, words are dwarf and you are a giant. From where should I bring such words as may define- no, definition is not all inclusive- from where should I bring such words as may express what you mean to me. I wish, I could become like you and each and every thread of my being expressed ‘you’.

….Sahar Raman Deep

Author of ‘The UnSaid: Listen to the Silence “

Embrace!

As puss comes out of a wound

My anxieties came out of me

Such was the effect of your embrace

O child of resonance !

As tears come out of dry eyes

As breath flows

In an attack of asthma

As a blister bursts on the skin

Of a child

An ah came out of my being

And I wondered

What was it

That just hug me

An angel or devil?

Or,

Plain innocence!

The UnSaid: Listen to the Silence

 

Dear friends, I am glad to announce that the ebook version of my first chapbook ‘The UnSaid’ is available on Amazon.com for preorder now. The paperback will be available on Nov. 7, 2018. I hope that you like the work.

Thanks.

Sahar Raman Deep.

 

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Drowning in My Own Self…

drowning in my own self
unable
to find a way out
of the abyss
that i am

long
long ago
a fairy had landed
on the thorn that pricked my heart
she tried to free me
but started bleeding a lot
her heart
her soul
her spirit
were wounded
she cried tears of blood
and all that I could do was
give her a
faint smile

this pain
this trauma
that she left with me
of not being able to
help her
while she was
helping me
is the deep scar
on the face of moon
incidentally
my heart-
a mass of white ashes
broken peaks
and dry rivers.

and I burn like stars
which are
no more visible
in the night sky
i burn myself
i burn myself
i burn myself
to be alive
for
the day I stop burning
i shall be no more
than a mass of
gray ashes

…Sahar Raman Deep

 

 

Knowing You

i do know
your name
and your face
and i certainly can
recognize your voice too
it’s been a long time
we have been together

i know a lot about you
your family
your friends
your likes and dislikes

but i am
still looking for you
within you
as if
i do not really know you

…Sahar Raman Deep

 

A Letter to My Love

Some people are more important than stardom or money; so are you. You are not only a person, but my relationship with myself. You are a song that my soul sings. You are the light in which my being seeks to understand Love. You are a you who has made love myself.

A thought: what if you are not real? You may not be real, but the love between us, at this moment in space and time, is more than real than any real can be. It is extraordinary! A moment lived in this living moment is more true than any number of years, centuries or lives lived in a common ‘love’ of give and take, of trust and doubt, of me and you.

Among us, there is no me and you. Among us, it’s a world of stars. Among us, there is unlimited expansion not to be limited by any binaries. Among us, there is only ‘us’; and ‘us’ is of oneness, of non duality, away from the world divided into dimensions.

Sahar Raman Deep.

5/21/17

In Rawness of Emotions…

In rawness of emotions
In rawness of thought
In rawness of heart
When no seed is bown
I think of humanity
How it has grown!… Read More

In rawness of emotions
In rawness of thought
In rawness of heart
When no seed is sown
I think of humanity
How it has grown!

Humanity meant
Law of jungle in forest
And the only rule
Was to survive
Then came the tribes
And the societies
Where survival was safe
And the need was to thrive.
Being loyal to the group
And to the leader
Was the mandate
Even if it meant
Death to the tenant.

Some saints and sages
Have been talking since ages
Of the particular
And the universal
And saying
Both are one
And the key to this realization
Is freedom, and alas!
Freedom is none!

They say we are free.
Though unchained and unbound
We are bound by
None other than we.
This is the story
Of us humans
Separated from the nature
Who bore us
In her womb
And many others
Whom we have forgotten.

We wait for a the doom!

…. Sahar Raman Deep.
12/14/16

Great Quotes 2

SaharRamanDeep.com

“I alone cannot change the world, but I can cast a stone across the water to create many ripples.” Mother Teresa

Poem

Write me down
On a piece of paper
And place it securely
In your heart
So that… Read More

Write me down
On a piece of paper
And place it securely
In your heart
So that
Naver can I
Escape thee

Lock me in
The ink of fate
And seal it
With thy name

Put me under
The tip of your pen
That I may sing you
Forever, till eternity!

O royal prince
Content am I
With what you give me
For nothing lies
Beyond your eyes!

The Depression

This wholeness and emptiness, alternating time and again, this feeling of having it all and the nothingness, this tendency…. Read more.

This wholeness and emptiness, alternating time and again, this feeling of having it all and the nothingness, this tendency to have found it all and then that terrible phase of having it all lost! A person swings from what she is to what she is not, often struggling to find a true identity. Here, in no way, I am talking of identity in relation to the Ultimate, but in a way relative to human existence, an identity we all have- I like this and I do not like this. We all know atleast this about ourselves! I do not. Any of the people struggling with my condition do not! And, it is called bipolar disorder.

At one time, I am a writer, an avid reader, an innovator. At another, I am a piece of shit! Sounds funny, right? It’s not.

Have you ever have had that feeling when you have failed and lost all confidence in you and what is yours? When you look into the mirror and you hate the person you are looking at? Find him ugly? Have you ever felt the world has gone against you, and you are hiding in a little hole, trying to protect yourself? Have you ever felt that you are terribly isolated and long for that human voice which may touch your heart and give you some comfort, all the while when your loved ones are around you?

This is it! This is it! The depression! The bipolar depression!

Us.. .

Not in the mind
Not in the brain
In the serenity of soul
I long for you… read more.

Not in the mind
Not in the brain
In the serenity of soul
I long for you

You, the eternal being
You, the soul of souls
You, the magnificent whole

You, who is born as me
You, who is born as he
You, who is born as us

Our relation is
That of the oneness
We are not three
We are one

We are one
That there is none
Who is not me
Who is not he
Who is not you

It is all us
It is everywhere us
And,
It’s no where us.

… Sahar RD (10/31/16)

Also read Legends .

Refugee Camps

Have you ever felt hopeless? Please participate in the discussion.

 

No,
Nothing new
To look forward to…
Is it called hopelessness?

Since long
They have lived with
All that was,
Having lost
Home, love and future
In hope of
Something better
For their children
Who now play
With broken dreams
In the refugee camps!

… Sahar Raman Deep
10/29/16

Also read The Legends .

Love Eternal!

 

Life can live
Only and only with you
O prince of winds
O beauty of heaven
O Love eternal!

You are the soul
The heart beats with
You are the essence
Blood flows with
You are the light
Eternity lives by

That moment of passion
Is long passed away
That thing of earth
Never was
It is the skies
Your love expands into

The oceans carry
Our love for life
The flowers blossom
Only to have our glimpse
And the waters ice
Only to reflect our hearts

No punctuation
No full stops
This is the flow
Of light unto life
Of soul unto spirit
Of matter unto divinity

… Sahar Raman Deep
10/28/16

Qisse- The Legends of Love 

What is your inspiration of love? What idea of love suits you the most- only the physical gratification or a soulful union too? You are invited to share your views.

 

Reading, knowing and being aware that a selfless, soulful, true love, in which the two lovers do not have a desire to possess, are not jealous, and find happiness in each other, is not only motivating and inspirational, but a solace to the starving heart as well. Also, it is always a pleasure to read about those who have achieved the zenith of love, who have met their soulmates and are living in perfect union with each other, in the way that yogis say, ‘you am I and I am thee’.

We, in the world of technology, too, have become technical, torn apart between the cravings of body and the needs of soul. Everyone is looking for that ‘one’, without wanting to be ‘the one’. This needs a lot of conviction, empathy, and shunning of materiality. With this in mind, I have decided to write this book, with not one, or two, rather three stories of eternal love. They are intermingled with each other in a way that one is the part of other.

The three stories I am talking about come from the land of undivided Punjab, half of which now lies in India and the other half in Pakistan, and are the mythic legends of Love- or Qisse. These are the stories of love found, and lost in the world, and attained to the fullest in world of spirits. These lovers go beyond what is physical, much beyond the idea of possession and long for union, not unity. A union is one in which the two merge together to form a new and higher than earlier identity; in unity the two remain separated. They are more like Khalil Gibran’s soul searching Love found in oneness of the life, and ‘the Life’. He writes, “Love possesses not nor will it be possessed, for love is sufficient unto love’.

This is what has given me the inspiration. What is your inspiration? How do you look at love? What is your idea of ideal love? I shall be delighted, and will appreciate if you would share your thought on the subject. It shall help me understand you better as I write for you. If you have other great ideas, please use the ‘Contact’ form.

⭐️⭐️⭐️ I shall soon be sharing the three stories as told in popular folklore! ???

… Sahar Raman Deep

 

 

CONTACT

 

 

 

Lost in the Wide

When Self is lost, everything is lost.

I am
Looking for a creature
Long lost
Who I used to call ‘me’.

No clue of
Where she’s gone
No clue
What corner of universe
She is in
She used to say
The whole world is mine,
Earth is my home
And heart is shrine.

Whose heart now
Should I peep into
Which particle on earth
I dig deep
No where is she
No where is she

Such people
Who do not
Have a self
Get lost easily
In the wide

They are
Laughed upon
Because they are different
They are thought, To be like
The crow who wore
A peacock feather
And not the peacocks
Nor the crows
Accepted him henceforth.

But she was different
She was not the one
To be lost in the mob
Nor was she a crow
Or a peacock
She was the essence
Of Love
And Love was she
Indeed!

Was that me?
Now I wonder
Lost in the
Hustle of life
Wandering in
Many separated streets
The idea of unity
Is an alien.
And Love?
There is none.
Union is Love
Not the unity
Which now I have
With myself
And, I don’t know who…

…. Sahar Raman Deep
10/19/16

Union in Love

Spiritual union of Love is an experience of a lifetime!

O Love!

I don’t want to

Cling to You…

I just want to

Hold the experience

Of oneness and expansion

Close to my heart

Ever and forever.

…. Sahar Raman Deep

 

My Bipolar

Bipolar Disorder, or Maniac Depression is a condition where a patient’s state of mind goes from one pole of mania to the other of depression. I have it too!

Bipolar Disorder, or Maniac Depression is a condition where a patient’s state of mind goes from one pole to the other, from mania to depression. I have it too! I am talking about it for the first time.

I was diagnosed with bipolar more than a decade ago. Since then, there has been no peace. Actually, peace was already lost. I was wandering between my desire to live an independent life, and a marriage that was forced upon me. I was doing my second masters degree at that time. Soon I started my Ph.D. My then husband was only a high school graduate. It’s not that degrees matter, but wisdom, attitude and maturity do! He had none! Now you will say, everyone has an attitude, but the truth is, if it is not helping you and the rest of the world move forward, or you just want to crawl while hoping for the sky, that’s no attitude at all. At one time, you start to cut others’ wings too.

That is what happened with me. He wanted me to study more and more, and all his family too, so that at another point in time, I can earn more and more.

I wil talk about the rest later. I need to talk, and if you are ready to hear, I will.

…. Sahar Raman Deep.  (10/18/16)

Nectar of Love

Nectar of Love is, Love itself!

This sun
And the rain!
When they get together
Creation happens

These bees
And the flowers!
When they mate
Honey comes to existence

This self
And the Ultimate
Make you and me
This is the only
Nectar of Love
You am I
I am thee.

… Sahar Raman Deep (10/14/16)

Autobiography of a Yogi (Self-Realization Fellowship) 

This book is for all those who are seeking a spiritual ideal for their practice. The writer, a monk from India, tells about his journey to spirituality, his mystic experiences and the great yogis he meets on the way. What he talks about is unbelievable to the millennial ear, but those who meditate and practice will definitely relate to what he says.
A must read for all spiritual seekers.

The Deadly Truth

I loved him
As he was
And
He loved me
As he wanted!

I know
The deadly truth
You
No more
Belong to me.

The fact is,
That you were never mine.
I have not lost you
In fact, I have found you
In your absence

When you were there,
I would fight with you
Shout at you
Humiliate you
Now
At least I realize
That I love you.

You always wanted
That I agree with you
Follow your steps
Say yes to everything you said
So that
You may love me.
I always sensed
That stiffness in your character
That never bends
But can break.
I did not want to break.
I chose my integrity.

Should I have chosen you
And lose myself
With time
And become incapable
Of loving
Anyone in the world?
Even my own kids?
And become guilty
In my own eyes,
And theirs.
How could I teach them
Self respect
When I had none?

I know,
Our ways have separated
Still, we walk
Hand in hand
In each other’s heart
I know you love me
And you know
That I love you,
Doesn’t matter
You think otherwise.

…Sahar Raman Deep

10/13/16